Posted by Arnold Ziffel on September 15, 2010 at 15:26 [68.192.151.63]
Welcome to a session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee (TVPC) – this writer’s favorite fantasy. The story takes place in a high school not unlike other high schools. In this high school, however, there are strict rules regarding the toileting behavior of the school’s female students. Those who break the school toilet rules (including the rules against going to the bathroom in your pants) are brought before the TVPC to have their cases heard and their punishment given out if they are guilty. Meetings of the TVPC are called to order at 3:10 PM each school day in the TVPC meeting room – Room 222 of the high school. It should be noted that where this story takes place you need to be 18 in order to enter high school so all persons depicted, even though entirely fictional, are at least 18 years of age.
My name is Arnold Ziffel and I’m chairman of the TVPC. What follows are the summary minutes of the TVPC meeting of September 15, 2010.
First up before the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee is Tiffany, a cute blonde-haired sophomore. What’s not so cute, however, is the rather substantial messy brown load sitting there shamefully in the seat of her panties. Mr. Slate, her 2nd period Geology teacher, reports that Tiffany was just sitting there in class when she suddenly loaded her panties really bad. “She didn’t even ask to go to the girls’ room,” Mr. Slate reports, “But obviously she had to go very, very bad.” Fortunately for her, it’s the first accident for her this school year, because an accident of this severity – it’s easily detectable through her tight jeans – would probably garner Tiffany more than the usual dose of punishment from me.
Under TVPC regulations, however, the first accident offense of the year, provided that the girl doesn’t have any other toilet violations this year, doesn’t get any punishment. It’s just a warning and (as with all school offenses – toilet or otherwise) a note goes home to her parents. It doesn’t make the load in her panties any less shameful, though. “I’m sorry,” she tells us, obviously quite embarrassed at what she’s done, “I was trying to hold it in until 3rd period when I have study hall and I could go to the girls’ room, relax, take my time and have some privacy.” “But all of sudden, I just couldn’t hold it in any longer,” she continues, “I guess I just ended up waiting too long.” “Well consider yourself lucky, Tiffany, because for a first offense you get off with just a warning and no punishment,” I explain, “But next time you WILL be punished.” “There won’t be a next time, I promise you that,” Tiffany assures us, “I never want to walk around all day with a mess in my panties like I had to do today.” “Thank you for not giving me a punishment,” she adds, “But I just don’t feel lucky after what I’ve been through with that mess in my pants today.” She also assures us that her mom “won’t be too happy” about this and she’ll be expecting some punishment at home. Personally, I hope it’s not too bad for her – it is only a first offense and a lot of girls have done much worse.
It’s already a second offense for Cindy, a shy petite freshman with braces. She was caught this morning also with a big load in her panties as she was walking into her 4th period English class. “She was wearing a skirt so it wasn’t so easy to tell – it’s not like the bulge they get when they do it in jeans,” Miss Johnson, her English teacher tells us, “But you can tell by the way they walk sometimes, and Cindy was definitely walking like she was carrying a load in her panties.” “And I could see that she was upset about something the moment she walked into my classroom,” Miss Johnson adds, “So I walked over to her and the smell made it obvious what she had done – and it smelled like she had just done it, too.
In tears, Cindy pleads guilty and begs for leniency in her punishment. She’s a sweet young lady and it’s hard not to feel sorry for her, but her accident leaves me quite concerned. “We’re just starting the third week of school and already you’ve had two accidents, Cindy,” I tell her, “This is obviously becoming quite a problem for you.” “This is your second time and I have to punish you for that,” I explain, “And the more times you come here with accidents in your pants, the worse your punishment gets.” “Yes, sir – I was just trying to hold it in until I got home,” she explains, fighting back the tears, “I thought I could make it – I guess I just had to go worse than I thought.”
“Really? – you thought you could hold it in until you got home?” I ask her. “It wasn’t even 4th period yet and already the accident was in your pants,” I explain, “And it wasn’t just a little bit in your panties, either, like when you don’t quite make it to the bathroom in time – this was your whole bowel movement in your pants and it wasn’t even lunchtime yet.” “Did you really think you could hold it in until you home?” I ask her again, “Or did you just not want to do it in the school bathrooms no matter what?” “I just can’t stand the idea of going poops in school,” she confesses as the tears flow anew, “I’ve gone pee a few times in school, but I just can’t stand going poops unless it’s in my own bathroom at home.” “Well, Cindy, you’re really going to have to learn to go BOTH WAYS in school,” I tell her in a firm but sympathetic tone, “Or you’ll be making a lot of appearances before this committee and that will sure not be pleasant for you.”
I finally get to the matter of Cindy’s punishment. In spite of my concerns about her, a second such accident is still not a serious offense. Furthermore, though, her panty-load is quite substantial – obviously it’s her full bowel movement in there – it’s not as bad as Tracy’s mess and not quite bad enough to warrant an enhanced punishment. Accordingly, she simply gets the standard punishment for a second panty-messing accident and that is 2 days of after school detention (1 hour per day) and having to write 200 times “I will not soil my panties in school again.” But I certainly hope that she leaves here with my warning in mind that she really needs to improve her toilet habits in school.
The next girl to be called before the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee is Nicole, a very pretty and prissy-type junior with shoulder-length blonde hair. Reading over the Violation Report filed by her Gym teacher, I see that she is charged with “Masturbating in a Shower Stall.” Her Gym teacher is Miss Mars, who is new to the school this year. “I’m confused as to the charge, Veronica,” I ask her, “Do you mean to say that she was masturbating in a BATHROOM stall?” “No – She was in a shower stall,” the Gym teacher explains, “She went in there before class like she was going to change in there, but I caught her masturbating instead. “I told her that there is nothing wrong with masturbation – I do it all the time myself,” the gorgeous young teacher tells us, “It’s just that you’re obviously not supposed to be doing it in the shower at school.”
That much is, of course, true but Miss Mars has made a big mistake. “The TVPC only has the power to punish toilet offenses,” I explain to the new teacher, “The school principal is the disciplinarian for everything else – everything that is not toilet-related.” “If she had been masturbating in a girls’ room stall or in the girls’ room itself, the case would belong with us,” I clarify for her, “But since she was doing it in the shower room instead of the bathroom, this belongs with the school principal. Knowing the TVPC’s reputation for stricter discipline, I wonder if that’s why she chose to do it in a shower stall instead of the girls’ room. Accordingly, I dismiss the charges against Nicole, but I dismiss them “without prejudice.” That means that Miss Mars is free to file the charges again – this time with the school principal. “Don’t worry about it – It’s a common mistake,” I let her know, “Just remember that the “T” in “TVPC” stands for “Toilet” – you can only bring in cases related to that.”
Moving on to our next case, we move on to something more serious – specifically “Smoking in the Girls’ Room”. Girls who smoke in the school bathrooms risk receiving the TVPC’s most dreaded punishment – the “toilet suspension”. Girls who get put on toilet suspension are not allowed to use any school bathroom for any reason for the entire length of the suspension. Nor can the young lady make other arrangements for a bathroom nor can she even go to the bathroom outside. If a girl can’t hold it in all day, and few girls can, especially when the punishment oftentimes includes after-school detention, the “toilet suspension” inevitably results in wet pants and oftentimes worse. Obviously it’s a punishment that most girls are desperate to avoid. But Debbie obviously was even more desperate to smoke because she risked a toilet suspension to do it.
Debbie is a senior beauty with long brown hair and she was caught earlier this afternoon grabbing a smoke in a stall in the Science Wing girls’ room when she should have been in Chemistry class. Mrs. Johns, our ace restroom monitor, is charging her with the smoking, but her Chemistry teacher is also here at the TVPC proceedings and has additionally charged Debbie with leaving class under false pretenses. “My girls’ room passes are for girls who actually need to use the girls’ room,” she tells us, a tinge of anger in her voice, “They are not for girls who think they need to go grab a smoke.”
“It was a really stupid thing to do,” Debbie rather candidly admits, “I really don’t have an excuse – I was just having a bad day and sometimes having a cigarette helps me relax.” “It was just a really stupid thing to do,” she repeats. “Do you think getting put on toilet suspension is going to make your day any better?” I ask. Suddenly, the sullen expression on her face turns to something else – some kind of strange combination of puzzlement and near panic. I repeat the question – “Do you think getting put on toilet suspension is going to make your day any better?” “Um, sir, Mr. Chairman, sir,” she mumbles, “I thought you only get a toilet suspension for a second offense – this is only my first time this year, sir,” “That’s not quite right, young lady,” I tell her. “A second offense GUARANTEES you a toilet suspension,” I explain, “But you can get one for a first offense, too – it’s not REQUIRED in the TVPC rules, but the committee can give you up to 2 weeks if we deemed appropriate.”
“Oh Please No! – Oh please don’t make me do a toilet suspension,” Debbie begs us, nearly breaking down in tears, “Oh please not that – there’s got to be some other way to punish me.” “You put me on toilet suspension for smoking last year but it was for my second offense, not my first,” she continues, “And it was the worst three weeks of my life – wetting my pants everyday was bad enough, but a lot of times I did the other thing, and nothing was worse than that.” “Please! I’ll do anything!! – just don’t make me go through a toilet suspension again,” she pleads on, “I promise I’ll never smoke in the girls’ room again.”
In spite of nearly being brought to tears, I’m not sure of her sincerity. I mean, she’s definitely sincere about not wanting to go on toilet suspension again, but she is an habitual smoker and I wonder if this is indeed her last time smoking in the girls’ room. Luckily for her, she has no previous toilet offenses this year of any kind and the regulations don’t allow me consider last year’s offenses. There is still the matter, though, of her being charged with leaving Chemistry class under false pretenses. Debbie flatly denies that charge. “I did do the smoking – I’m definitely guilty of that,” she admits again, “But I really did have to go to the bathroom – I had to go both ways.” “I really did go to the girls’ room because I had to go,” Debbie continues, “It’s just that while I was going, I got stupid and lit up that cigarette. “I can’t be completely sure, but I think she’s telling the truth on that one,” Mrs. Johns, our restroom monitor tells us, “When I caught her, she did have her pants down and she was sitting on the toilet.” “I did hear her rolling off toilet paper like she had a lot of wiping to do,” our ace restroom monitor adds, “And I heard her flush the toilet, too and it obviously wasn’t to get rid of her cigarette.”
In view of that, I find her not guilty of that particular charge and after very careful consideration, decide NOT to impose the toilet suspension on her for the smoking. Only in rare cases do girls get a toilet suspension for a first time smoking in a school year and I really have no grounds to be that severe with Debbie this time. That’s not to say that Debbie will be let off easily, though, as even a first-time smoking in the girls’ room is a serious offense. For punishment she will write 1,000 times, “I will not smoke in the girls’ room in school again.” I also give her a hefty sentence of after-school detention – 2 full weeks of it (one hour per day) during which she’ll stand in the corner with a sign on her back stating “I smoked in the girls’ room.” Though surely relieved not to be getting a toilet suspension, she certainly has no reason to be happy.
“I doubt that smoking has made your day any better,” I tell her in closing, “And it’ll certainly make your day a lot worse if you do it again.” “A second offense for smoking warrants a toilet suspension of at least 2 weeks and up to 1 month,” I warn her, “And I’m telling you right now that next time you can count on getting the maximum.”
Before getting to the next case, I must pause to demand silence from the back of the room. In the back of the room, we have girls serving their TVPC detentions for their various toilet-related offenses. Specifically, I turn my attention to 2 very pretty but also very chatty juniors named Barbie and Denise. Barbie, a short, well-built blonde, is serving detention for flushing a sanitary napkin down the toilet while Denise, a tall, skinny brunette, is our guest this afternoon for teasing another girl about her wetting accident. “Detention is not a social hour, young ladies,” I tell them, “You are here to be punished, not to catch up on the latest gossip.” “I’ve got some writing paper and a big supply of pens right here,” I warn them, “And if I have to interrupt these proceedings one more time for you two, that paper is going to have your names on it, if you get my drift.” “Yes, sir,” they each answer me, almost in unison and they refocus their attention on more important pursuits. I see Denise doing her Chemistry homework and Barbie is back to working on her writing assignment – 250 times of “I will not flush sanitary napkins down the toilet in school again.”
For our next case, we have a smart and energetic sophomore named Blossom and she is charged with soiling her panties. Blossom, however, has pleaded “Not Guilty” and stands her puzzled as why the charge has even been brought. “I just didn’t go in my panties,” she says puzzled, “I don’t know what else to say about this – I just didn’t do it.”
“You can check my panties again if you want – You’ll just see that there is no mess in them at all,” she adds.
The charge has been brought by Miss Collins, her gym teacher, who has rather candidly admitted that she hasn’t directly seen any mess in Blossom’s panties. “I was all set to give her a panty-check after gym class this morning,” Miss Collins explains, “But I didn’t get a chance with all that commotion we had before with Carrie and those other girls in the shower.” Miss Collins has put together an interesting case against Blossom nonetheless. She reports that Blossom was walking a little funny in gym class today (like one would walk with a load in her panties); that she was constantly adjusting her panties during gym class (like one would do if the panties were soiled and uncomfortable); and that after gym class in the girls’ locker room, she went into a toilet stall to change (like one would do if she didn’t want people to see that her panties were messed in). She also notes that Blossom was one of the last girls out of the locker room for gym class today. “She’s normally one of the first girls to come out,” Miss Collins reports, “But today she was in a bathroom stall until the very last minute – Like she was trying to clean up her messy panties in there.”
“I was in there going #2,” Blossom answers emphatically, “It’s was just that I didn’t go in there right away and it was taking me a little while to finish.” She goes on to explain that at first she wasn’t going to go to the bathroom in there because the toilets in the girls’ locker room aren’t really the greatest as to privacy. She says that she then realized that she had to go worse than she thought and she decided that she’d better go and take care of it right then. “It’s hard to hold it in while running around and stuff and the last thing I wanted was to have a mess in gym class,” she points out, “I was a little late coming out of the locker room because I was doing it in the toilet not because I was cleaning it out of my panties.” Blossom was definitely having a BM in there before gym class,” reports Pam, a classmate of hers, “I was in the next stall changing a tampon and I could hear what she was doing in the next stall.” “I remember thinking what a brave girl she was to be doing a BM in the girls’ locker room,” Pam adds, “I’m glad it wasn’t me because I know I’d never be able to do a BM in there with the stalls facing where everybody changes.” Blossom also explains that she may have been walking a little funny because she injured herself a little during dance lessons last night (Blossom loves to dance, I’m told) and that she was way behind in doing her laundry and she changed in a bathroom stall because she didn’t want the other girls to see the old ragged panties that she was wearing. “And they were really uncomfortable during gym class, too,” she adds, “But I just didn’t do a mess in them – Honestly, I didn’t.”
Mrs. Garrett, a TVPC staffer, did do a panty-check on Blossom earlier today and she reports that the girl’s panties showed no evidence of being messed in. Of course, that doesn’t rule out the possibility that Blossom did have the accident, cleaned herself up, and changed into new panties. But we, of course, cannot simply assume that she did that. I only wish that Miss Collins had been able to check her panties after gym class to confirm this one way or the other, but there was that incident with Carrie in the shower that needed her immediate attention.
I offer Blossom one last chance to plead “Guilty.” “This would be your first accident this year and you have no other toilet violations,” I remind her, “Your only punishment for this would be a warning.” “But if you lie about it, you don’t just get a warning, you get an actual punishment,” I point out, “And then you also get an additional punishment for lying, as well.” But Blossom remains firm in asserting her innocence. “I didn’t do it – I just didn’t do it,” she says, “I went in the toilet and not in my panties.” Based on the available evidence, specifically that neither Miss Collins nor anyone else actually saw any mess in Blossom’s panties, I find her “Not Guilty.”
Just when I think we’re done with our actual cases for the day, we have a surprise visit from Miss Cooke, who is apparently here to present another case. She is one of our Math teachers and she doubles as our girls’ Tennis coach. She brings with her Steffi, a tall well-built senior with shoulder length blonde hair who is the star player on our girls’ Tennis team. A quick glance at Steffi’s white shorts leaves little doubt as to what this case is about. “That’s quite a shameful and disgusting display,” I tell our young tennis star, “I’m quite surprised to see a senior such as yourself, and a team captain to boot, standing before me with such badly soiled panties.” “With those white shorts you’re wearing, there’s not only a bulge from the fecal load, but you can actually see it through the shorts,” I point out, “Not to mention that it looks like some of it was running down your legs.”
Her coach explains that Steffi had this accident only a short time ago while at tennis practice, which is just down the street from the school. She has brought her star player directly here to face her punishment. “We were having our regular tennis practice and everything is going fine,” Coach Cooke explains, “And all of a sudden all the action stops and everyone is staring at Steffi.” “Then I look over there and I see this big, brown bulge growing there under those white shorts,” her coach explains, “Steffi is just standing there on the court going to the bathroom in her panties.” “I’ve never seen anything so disgusting,” she points out, “At least not from a girl in high school.”
“I just can’t believe I did this – I’m so embarrassed,” the senior tells us, “I mean, it’s my own fault, of course, but I still can’t believe I could let this happen.” She goes on to explain that she first starting feeling the need to go during her last period German class and the need to go was more apparent as she was changing for tennis practice in the girls’ locker room. “But the toilets in the girls’ locker room are pretty bad and there’s a really nice bathroom down at the tennis courts,” she explains, “So I decided to hold it in and wait until I walked down to the tennis courts so I could go in the bathroom there.” But unfortunately for her, the bathroom at the tennis courts was locked and out of order. “I guess I should have come right back to school and done what I had to do,” Steffi tells us, “But it was time for practice to start and I thought I could hold it in until practice was over.” “By the time I realized that I couldn’t hold it in that long, it was too late,” the poor girl admits, “It was already coming out in my pants and there was no time to get back to the school in time.” “I wish I could do it all over again,” the embarrassed senior tells us, “The toilets in the girls’ locker room aren’t so bad at all compared to this.” “It was just so stupid of me – I still can’t believe I could let this happen,” she pleads, “I don’t go to the bathroom in my pants anymore and here I just did it again.”
Steffi had quite a few accidents her freshman year, many of them “doubleheaders” (that is, both a wetting and a messing accident), but she’s cleaned up her act considerably since then. This is not only her first accident this year, but her first accident since she was a freshman. Unfortunately, since she had to punished for loitering in the girls’ room during the first week of school this year, she is not entitled to be let off with just a warning for this. In fact, her coach is advocating for a more severe punishment for her – pleading her case that this should be considered “an accident while representing the school.” Accidents by those representing the school (such as athletes or cheerleaders) at school events bring disgrace not only to the girl having the accident but to her whole team and even the whole school and are thusly punished much more severely than those that merely occur at school. “She represents the school as a member and even the captain of the tennis team,” the coach argues, “And she even did it right there on the tennis court for Pete’s sake.”
It is an interesting argument, but I have to disagree with our over-zealous tennis coach. “Obviously, she is guilty of messing in her pants,” I announce for the record, “But she is only considered to be representing the school when it’s at a regular match or even a scrimmage with another school.” “This is only a practice, so we can’t hold that rule against her,” I continue, “So this is only a regular accident – albeit a disgusting one – demanding only a regular punishment.” Accordingly, she is sentenced to 2 days detention and she has to write 200 times, “I will not mess in my panties in school or at tennis practice again.” But I do stipulate to Steffi that, “from now on, you’ll need to use the toilet BEFORE going down to the tennis courts and by that I mean using the toilets in the girls locker room EVERYDAY right before you go to tennis.” Coach Cooke is a bit upset at the leniency of the punishment (although it is more than most girls get for their first soiling accident of the school year), but for the senior beauty I don’t think any punishment could be worse than the embarrassment she is feeling about the accident. “I seriously doubt that she’s going to be doing this again anytime soon,” I explain to her coach. “You’re probably right,” she acknowledges.
The next item on the TVPC agenda is a bit of committee business. Monica, a pretty, well-endowed, full-figure senior stands before the TVPC not charged with an offense today, but in a bit of trouble nonetheless. Her problem stretches all the way back to band camp last summer. Band camp is when the band members go away for a week in the summer to practice their routines and get ready for the upcoming school year. Since band camp is a school event, the toileting behavior of the female band members comes under TVPC jurisdiction. I’m sorry to say that this year’s band members racked up quite a list of toilet violations at the camp. Monica was worst than most. There were so many cases, in fact, that the TVPC had to convene a special session the day before school started just to deal with the toilet violations from band camp. At that session, Monica got handed a hefty pile of writing assignments for her toilet violations – specifically, Smoking in the girls’ room (1,000 times), messing in her panties (100 times), messing in her panties a second time (200 times) and she also got another 500 times for trying to lie her way out getting punished for the second accident. The only good news she got was being found not guilty of yet another messing accident for soiled panties that were found hidden in the shower room at camp. The latter offense would have meant a lot more writing and hiding soiled panties like that is an automatic toilet suspension. The TVPC is still investigating who those soiled panties actually belonged to.
The matter is before the TVPC today because Monica still hasn’t finished all her writing assignments. Under TVPC regulations, girls are given 1 week to hand in their punishment writing assignments. One week ago, she appeared before the TVPC again. She had finished the 100 times for her first accident as well as the 200 times for her second accident and also the extra 500 times she got for lying about it. However, she had only finished 500 of the 1,000 times that she had to write for the smoking violation. Under TVPC regulations, any assignment not written by its due date gets doubled. So with 500 times not written, Monica got that doubled and still owed us 1,000 times.
Well today, one week from her last TVPC appearance, she is being asked to hand in those 1,000 times. Regrettably, she informs us that she has completed only 800 of those sentences. “I’m sorry, sir,” she tells me, “It’s just so boring sitting there writing those lines over and over again,” “It just takes so long to finish – I just couldn’t make myself sit down and finish it,” she continues, “So I guess I’m going to get it doubled it again.” “Well, I’m sorry to hear that, Monica,” I tell her, “But getting your punishment doubled again is the least of your problems now.” I then inform this young lady of the TVPC regulations applicable to her situation. “The first time you don’t finish a writing punishment, we just double it,” I tell her, “The second time we not only double it, but we put you on toilet suspension until it’s done.”
Obviously Monica was fully expecting now having 400 sentences to write, but she wasn’t expecting this. “I guess I better buckle down and get all those sentences done tonight,” Monica tells us, “I had toilet suspension once when I was a freshman and I certainly don’t want to go through that again.” “That’s good advice you’re giving yourself,” I acknowledge, “But I think I should clarify the regulation for you.” I then let her know that in situations like this, a girl must appear before the TVPC to hand in her punishment writing. “Even if you do get your writing done tonight,” I tell her, “You still have to wait until after school to come here and hand them in.” Suddenly, the look on Monica’s face turns from surprise to outright panic as she contemplates spending tomorrow (at least!) on toilet suspension. “You’ve had more than ample opportunity to get the writing done,” I tell her, “You have no one to blame for this but yourself.”
Mrs. Garrett then attaches a red wristband to Monica’s wrist. These are like the wristbands that patients in the hospital wear and can’t be removed unless they’re cut off. These red wristbands indicate that the girl is on toilet suspension and they make it easier for teachers to identify who is allowed to use the girls’ room and who is not. If someone sees Monica in a girls’ room for any reason tomorrow, she’ll be back here for more punishment including more time on toilet suspension.
Monica is not the only girl with a punishment writing assignment due today. Gail, an attractive, athletic but oftentimes ditzy junior, owes us a 1,000 word essay entitled, “The Importance of Flushing the Toilet.” This was a punishment given to her one week ago for failing to flush the toilet after having a bowel movement in it. Today is only the first due date for her punishment essay, so Gail won’t face a toilet suspension if it’s not done. But obviously it’s to her advantage to hand in the 1,000 words today rather than have it doubled and owe us 2,000 words by next week.
Calling the girl forward, I’m happy to note that she’s holding several sheets of paper in her hand. “All done,” she tells me with a smile, “A 1,000 word essay.” She hands her punishment to the TVPC clerk who notes that it appears to be in good order – it is legible enough to be read easily and it appears to be of sufficient length. Of course, the essay will be carefully read and an exact count of the words will be made and, as per TVPC regulations, misspelled words do not count in the total. But for now, the assignment is accepted and the smiling junior redhead is dismissed.
For the last item on today’s TVPC agenda, I have asked Mr. Hornman, the school’s band director to join us. “Mr. Hornman,” I tell him, “The TVPC needs your help.” “The TVPC has serious concerns about the toilet habits of many of the girls in your band,” I explain, “We need your help in properly toilet training them, especially since their poor toilet habits reflect badly on all of us.”
It’s only September and it’s already been a rough year for the band toilet-wise. It started with all those toilet problems at band camp this summer and it certainly hasn’t gotten any better now that the school year has started. “There were 6 messing accidents from the girls in your band at last Friday night’s football,” I remind him, “I understand that they only had port-o-potties there and the girls don’t like to use them, but they have to learn that a port-o-potty is better than going in your pants.” “And your girls weren’t much better the weekend before,” I note, “There were three accidents at that game and that was our home field which has regular bathroom facilities.” These accidents, as well as any other toilet violations occurring at school events over the weekend, are heard by the TVPC on Monday afternoon when we get back to school. Since the band represents the school at football games, the toileting behavior of the girls in the band not only comes under TVPC jurisdiction, but toilet violations are punished more severely (Under the “while representing the school” rules) just as they are for athletes or cheerleaders or other representing the school at events. This Monday’s session, with those 6 messing accidents from the band alone, took an hour and a half – one of the longest TVPC sessions we’ve ever had.
“Needless to say, these accidents have got to stop,” I tell Mr. Hornman, “These girls are not only disgracing themselves with their poor toilet habits, but they are disgracing you, me and the whole school.” “I couldn’t agree more,” he tells us, “The last thing I want to be known as is the director of the band that isn’t toilet trained – And I can’t even begin to describe how bad the bus smelled coming home 2 weeks ago with 6 girls on board with messes in their pants. With us both in agreement that decisive action needs to be taken in this regard, I ask the band director to come up with a plan to improve the toilet habits of the girls in his band. Mr. Hornman humbly accepts this important task. “I’ll do my best,” he tells us, promises to get back to the TVPC shortly with the details of his plan.
So concludes another session of the Toilet Violations Punishment Committee. Meeting adjourned at 3:52 PM.