Posted by Annie on December 13, 1998 at 12:34
This is my first post to this board. I have been following the postings here for some time now, and I enjoy quite a lot of them. Than you for sharing your experiences - I, like many others I have read about here, thought for a long time that I was alone with my "wet" preferences - now I know I am not.
I'm a woman, 30 yrs old now, but when this happened I was 20, and a student. One of my friends talked me into giving blood at the hospital, and I had done that one time already, and everything went OK. I had a solid breakfast the morning I went to give blood, as we were instructed to have, and I drank juice after I had been giving blood. But the next time was more complicated. For some reason, I fainted inside the hospital after giving blood, and was instructed by the nurses to drink more juice and a soda before leaving. I went back to my chair to lie down again, and I drank everything they told me to drink. I dind't like the situation and wanted to get out of there quick. My friend was there too waiting for me. I said I felt OK after a while, although I didn't, and got up, walked over to my closet to get my jacket - and then I felt like I was going to faint again. I went bak to the waiting room and sat down in one of the chairs there, hoping not to be spotted by the nurses, because I didn't want to drink any more. A bit unrational thinking, that's how I get when I'm inside hospitals. Just want to get out of them. So, there I was sitting, feeling not too good, and my friend asked what was wrong. I said I just wanted to sit there for a little bit before we left, but I soon got worse, and the last think I remember was the nurses coming towards me, picking me up from my chair as I was fainting again. I woke up in a little room, with a nurse, my friend and a laaaaarge jug of water besides my bed. I was told to drink the whole jug, before that I was not allowed to leave. Well, I figured I better drink it real quick if I want to get out of here quick. So I did. I drank almost everything, and it was a lot - pure water. I felt real stuffed afterwards, and during the last glass, some of the water almost came up my throat again.
Now my friend and I was allowed to leave. We went up to the university library to work on a project. It was not a long distance, and we were on her bike (I was sitting on the back of hers). That was when I felt for the first time that I had to go. At the library, I went. We were at the library for maybe an hour or maybe a little more, and within that time, I went 5-6 times. My bladder kept filling up again, and 10 minutes after I had just peed, I had to pee so bad again I couldn't sit still. After an hour or so, my need to go was still there, but it felt like I could hold it a bit longer. I went one last time at the library, I timed it so I would go and empty my bladder just before the bus I was taking home would come, because then I figured I would be OK until I got home. But unfortunately, I had timed it a little wrong - because the bus had just gone when I came down to the bus stop, and I had to wait another 15 minutes for the next bus to come. After 5 minutes I felt the urge again. When the bus came, I felt quite a pressure on my bladder, but I thought that as long I could sit down, it would be OK. I found a seat by the door, so I wouldn't be in a line to get off the bus. Smart thinking, I was a clever little girl, and the last thing I wanted was to wet myself in public. I was afraid I might loose control, I was sweating, breathing fast and shivering in my seat, wiggling quite a bit too. The bus ride home was 20 minutes, and there were no place to get off to go to a bathroom along the route. After a little while, maybe 10 minutes, I had to put my hand in my crotch and squeeze between my legs. I put my bag in my lap so no one would see. I was so embarrassed, all alone (my friend had left me at the library), and almost crying because it felt like I was going to wet myself. I thought about how I would manage the 5 min. walk from the bus stop to my home, and that made my lips shiver, I was almost in tears - so I stopped thinking about that and just thought about holding it the next 60 seconds - a minute at a time. I had to go so bad, I knew that I would wet myself if I got up from my seat at the wrong time. I have always, as long as I can remember, had those "waves" - when I have to go bad, it sometimes gets a lot worse, that's when I hold myself with my hand and squeeze my legs together - and when the wave goes away, I can pretend it's not so bad for a little while till the wave comes back again. And the waves keep coming, with more power and shorter "rests" in between. This is how it was on the bus - only the waves were so bad I knew I would pee my pants if a wave hit me the moment I was to get up from my seat. Luckily, there was no wave, and I got out of the bus still in dry pants. They were a little damp between my legs, but that was just from sweating and holding myself, pressing the pants deep into my crotch, I guess. I had to stop at the traffic light to cross the road. There were several traffic lights, and I suddenly felt a wave again and started to walk on red - I couldn't stand still. I had my hands in my pockets in my jack, a green oilskin jacket that went down to my thies, and with both hands I held tight on to my jeans, pressing my jeans into my crotch. That helped me hold it - there was no way I could have stayed dry with only my muscles. I started walking, and had to find the right tempo - not too fast, not too slow. My eyes started to fill up with tears and I couldn't see straight. I felt so helpless. I managed to get very close to home, I was walking along a shopping street and I lived in a block in a side road from that street. I always took a little short cut, up a little hill from the shopping street to my street. When I saw the hill, I had to stop and do a pee dance in front of a shop. The sight of the hill so close to home, and my block behind it, almost made me pee right there. That is another thing I get when I have to go bad and are almost home, on my door step, or even inside the bathroom - I sometimes have to do a pee dance there to stop the wave that always comes when I'm that close to making it - it seems like my body and bladder muscles relax too early. I sometimes have peed my pants in front of a toilet in those situations. But this time, I saw the building and did a pee dance - I thought, when I have made it this far, I will make it the rest of the way too. I started to walk up the little hill. I was just a tiny little hill, maybe 30 metres long, and midways I felt that I was loosing it. That's when it happened. I was alone, there were no other people in that hill, but a lot of people saw me doing my pee dance at the foot of the hill. I felt the first hot spurt in my pants, enough to make my panties and my jeans wet through. I didn't know how wet I had gotten, all I thought of was getting inside. I ran the last few meters to my door, and there I had to stop to get my key. I remember peeing while running to the door, and I still peed when I was at the door looking for my key. I felt my legs getting wet, and my socks. I started to cry, and then the door opened and one of the neighbours in my block came out. She said: "Whats wrong" and I just looked down on my then very wet pants and the puddle underneath, and just cried. She said "It's all right, you'll feel better when you get into some dry pants, go on, I won't tell anyone." and she smiled. I felt so stupid, I got inside, took the elevator upstairs to my apartment and changed. Later I told my neighbour about the hospital and what caused the accident, and we laughed about it. That was not the first or the last time I wet my pants, I have done it lots of times, but never in front of anyone like that again.
This was a very true story. Hope you understand my English. It is not my first language - I live in Norway.