Posted by Missery loves company on August 29, 2006 at 22:54 [66.90.172.3]
In Reply to: Lost My LG posted by SFLDaddy on August 29, 2006 at 11:31
I don't know why but in my sick demented mind, knowing people have survived worse things than me, makes me feel better. So I figured I would share my last hope with you. This is the short condenced version, more to the store, but this will give you an idea.
Ive known this guy online for 3+ years, we have gotten along great on computer, cam, and phone. We make each other laugh, he cheers me up when I am down, and I try and cheer him up when he I is down. We know each others fantasies along with, each others everyday interests and hobbies.
For me when I chat with people online, I know within the first 10 conversations if I don’t want to meet them, if I want to meet them, or if I have to meet them. He was a have to from the start, Yet its 3 years later and we still haven’t met. I think it was the same for him, because earlier on, he made comments that I needed to move to his town. Being earlier on, I didn’t take these comments seriously, and I still think I am correct in doing that, maybe.
(for story telling purposes I am going to name the guy Tigger)
First year, about the first 6 months of this year I was on and off with a boyfriend, who was not good for me. So coming home upset, pissed, and crying often, Tigger would comfort me, and tell me how guys are no good. And he would bring a smile back to my face. To me he really became my best friend, because between work, school, and the b/f. I had no time to socialize with my real friends. So we did set up to meet this first year, but before I could purchase my tickets to visit him, something come up on his end, out of his control. I accepted that things can come up. During most of this time, we were chatting on the computer at least every other day, and talking on the phone once a week.
Second year we are still learning new things about each other. He is still advise, and cheering me up when I need it. Still chatting on regular basis, then He disappears on me, I hadn’t noticed for a few days because of being busy, when I call him up on the normal day and “sorry this number has been disconnected”. So thinking something drastic had happened I look on the internet and look through the obituaries for Tigger or his exwife (that would mean he was probably jailed). Nothing. A week goes by or so, I am alittle worried still, try the phone again, still disconnected. I stay worried, start thinking I did something wrong. As soon as I start getting over it poof, 2 months gone, and he shows up online. Messages every yahoo screen and emails every account I have. I don’t remember if he actually used the word sorry, I think he has a problem saying that word. But basically he didn’t mean to loose contact with me, finances got his phone and internet cut, and I should fly out to ….blah blah blah place and meet him. He assured me that he had the time off and money. I was excited to see him back again, so I said sure. So two months later I planned to take off of work and skipped school. A week before the trip, he avoids me online, and doesn’t answer my phone calls. I give him a way out so he doesn’t have to talk to me, I leave a message saying when I am going to be at work, and give him my phone card number incase he can not afford the call. Asking him just to let me know whats going on. Nothing. Two days before the trip he leave me a message, reminding me of the lessons he taught me about guys, and that he turned into one of those guys. His excuse, was that the finances didn’t come through for him. But I offered to pay for the gas to get him to our vacation spot, but of course male pride wouldn’t allow that, so I went on vacation alone. That hurt, but I tried to understand and forgave. We continued our close relationship online, chatting, laughing, and enjoying each others company. For about a year nothing big or exciting going on, that takes us up to about 6 months ago. I know he has gotten more responsibilities added to his life, and that could have a little to do with it. We talk maybe once a month now. For about the last year, he has been hiding from other woman but usually would talk to me, now he is online hiding but never talks to me. But I still don’t know why.
This was a relationship I took seriously, and we built on it slowly as friends, still didn't work. But I accept that there is nothing I can do, the person screwing with you is the one that is loosing out.
~ABMeshell
Email: abmeshell@yahoo.com