Posted by remy on August 05, 2006 at 02:37 [62.31.50.148]
In Reply to: Re: Question for LG’s and Daddies… posted by daddy's button on August 04, 2006 at 21:13
Thanks Trish for a thoughtful and interesting post.
Well, yes, spanking and other forms of non-physical punishment are most definitely a part of the relationship my Daddy and I have.
Unlike daddy’s little button, I find myself in a relationship with a man who, whilst very loving and nurturing, is also very strict. He sets firm rules and boundaries and expects them to be adhered to. If I don’t, then there are penalties, both physical and non-physical.
What form physical discipline takes will obviously depend on the seriousness and nature of my misbehavior. Sometimes it’s a swat on my nappied bottom as a quick reminder to keep me in line, a slap on my hand or smacked legs. For more serious misbehaviour, it’s a bare-bottomed spanking over his knee. Almost always he’ll use his hand, but on a few memorable occasions I’ve found myself on the receiving end of a slipper or wooden spoon. This resulted in me being a very sorry little girl indeed and I was particularly well-behaved for some time afterwards!!
In addition, Daddy also uses non-physical punishments – either in conjunction with, or instead of, spanking. So very often a spell over his knee will also be followed by cornertime or me being sent to bed early. Sometimes he’ll simply use time out (on the naughty chair or step) as a way for me to cool off and think about my behaviour. I have also had privileges removed (computer, favourite programmes, bubbles in my bath!).
The worst for me, though, was grounding (a fortnight). It just felt so childish and having to tell my friends that I couldn’t go out on of our regular Saturday evenings was hugely embarrassing (though of course I didn’t tell them the real reason why!!). The thought of them being out having fun in the grown-up world while I was being kept in for being (in Daddy’s words) “a naughty little girl who won’t do as she’s told” was extremely humiliating. Whilst they were out until the early hours, I was having my nappy changed, being given an early bath and being put to bed at 7pm. This was one of those key moments that reinforced the relationship I (happily) find myself in.
As to whether this falls within the BDSM spectrum, well in my very limited experience, my humble opinion is that it most definitely does. The punishment he administers, and I willingly accept (though not always at the time!) is not extreme in terms of physical force or pain, but his Dominance and my submission to it are key.
Undoubtedly I crave the boundaries and discipline enforced and for this reason I don’t perceive them as abusive. Whilst Daddy will sometimes simply expand upon these desires a little - when spanking me, he tends to think that my bottom should become redder than I feel it needs to be :-)- on the whole our views are very similar indeed. I recognise that I’m very fortunate in this respect – if I were with someone who wanted to expand things way beyond my comfort zone, then for me this would cross into unpleasant territory (though I accept that pushing hard limits is pleasurable for some).
In summary:
Do I crave childish punishments? Yes.
Do I sometimes resent them and feel very sorry for myself when he’s administering them? Absolutely.
Do they have the desired effect of making me feel like a well-punished little girl? Embarrassingly so.
Do they leave me feeling loved, cared for, nurtured and protected? Yes, and very happy(though not smug!) with the situation I find myself in.
And just in case you think this is written from the perspective of someone who hasn’t been punished for a while, I was put to bed early last night with stinging legs for being "a cheeky little madam" (again, his words!) :-)
Take care