Posted by Daddy Tom on June 18, 2006 at 12:12 [152.163.100.7]
Hello everyone. this fathers day weekend has been very rough for me. i lost my dad last december. to say we had a rocky relationship would be putting it lightly. today was the first time i have been back to the cemetery since the funeral.
this past thursday my babygirl ran away from me. i know i did my best but she is still very conflicted toward her feelings for diapers and being a babygirl. i was her first daddy. i made things as easy for her as i could. worst part of all of this is she said good bye via email. she has been pushing herself so hard with school and work. she cracked under the pressure and went home. i didnt find out until after the fact. i tried calling and emailing. finally she responded saying that our time together was great but now she wasnt in the "lil girl mindset". she said that she wants to break off all contact with me.
she has some personal items of mine that i would like back. worst of all, i went on ebay for her and bought a few things that she wanted. she asked me to do this. i love shopping for my babygirls so this was a pleasure. now im left with a bunch of new babygirl gear, but no babygirl.
she didnt even make mention to meet to return what she has of mine. it was a very cold and unfeeling email i received. it was almost like she was thanking me for giving her an opportunity, like it was a job interview.
we met online. she contacted me and we hit it off from the start. we enjoyed a lot of the same authors and music. im 30 and she is 24. i knew this would be a lot of work but thats what im about. Being a daddy isnt all fun and games. i knew she was conflicted and i helped her get past quite a lot to get to where she was. ultimately she did what she thought was best. i just wish she could have called and been a little more personable. i wish her nothing but the best. this is very new to me. i have NEVER had a little one become so cold and distant. i told her that this all gets easier as you get older. it has for me and it has for my ex girlfriend. i still babysit my ex as we have moved on in our lives. we are very good friends. i watch out for her like a big brother and also take care of her. i offered to have her meet and play with my ex but she was too scared to let anyone but me see her as a babygirl. just to let everyone know, she was cool with me babysitting my ex. she knew there wasnt anything physical happening except diaper changes. im able to be a daddy and not have it be overly sexual. however it is partly sexual for me and i am 100% comfortable with that.
im will collect myself and take some time for me before i begin my search for a babygirl.
i would like to hear from daddies who have experienced this in real time, and not online. i have never been a daddy that just comes and goes. has anyone ever had a little one just take off all of a sudden?
thanks for reading.
peace to you all.
Dont dream it, Be it
Daddy Tom
Email: smoovepop@aol.com