Posted by stinky babygirl on March 22, 2006 at 01:26 [67.68.214.25]
About ten days ago my dadddy made me post an essay on this site as a punishment. It was the hardest, most embarassing thing I ever had to do. I had just spent my first night in diapers and was not going to be changed until my essay was finished. I was only able to get through writing it by focusing on my reward of being cleaned.
Since that first day, I have tried not to think about that very public confession. I have also made an effort to behave myself and listen to daddy, not wanting to give him any reason to ever punish me publicly like that again.
20 minutes ago I was lying on the floor by daddy's desk. While he clicked away on the computer I was happily amusing myself with my crayons and coloring book (a habit I never outgrew). He called me over wanting to show me something. This usually meant a new dress for me that he found on ebay. But instead of ebay he showed me this site, and my essay. I felt my stomach sink as he read the responses. I never felt so exposed before.
Now he wants me to update everyone on my progress. I am not being punished but he says since people took the time to respond, it would be rude not to write back. He also says if I don't do it now, I can always wait until I need changing to do it.
So here I am. First of all, I want to thank everybody who read my essay, particularly the people who wrote back. For those who were wondering, yes my story is true. and yes my daddy did change me when it was finished.
As for my progress, I'm not quite sure how to describe it. I have spent the last 10 days wearing and using diapers like a real baby. I have become dependant on daddy for my most basic needs. I would not say that I enjoy it but I am learning to accept my situation. I feel more helpless and under daddys control then I ever did as his little girl and I am ashamed to admit that I like that. I still fight the urge to use my diapers, especially messing them. I do get some physical pleasure when I am changed out of a wet diaper int a dry one, but it doesn't compare to the indignity and disgrace I feel when I am forced to mess myself and have to ask daddy to change me.
Daddy wants me to tell you that I am crying as I write this. He says I can stop now but only if I promise to start writing regular updates. Next time, he wants me to tell everyone about the first time I had to wear diaper in public.
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