Posted by A. on March 18, 2005 at 14:10 [12.210.221.132]
In Reply to: Re: What makes a LG vs AB? posted by MyMelody on March 18, 2005 at 13:14
To me, the only way to deal with labels is 1) let people self-identify and 2) avoid using how people label themselves to discriminate/exclude in any manner but the very most broad. Labels can never have any absolute definition, as human communication is the act of constantly re-negotiating labels (and other such icons).
When it comes down to it, are labels necessary, or are we just lazy? I feel like I see all sorts of people who simply post that they "are" some label, and expect people to understand exactly what they mean from it even though there is either no real consensus definition or they deviate substantially from what is seems to be the consenus oppinion of a given forum. To me, these people (though I've found myself guilty of it before) are simply fetishizing a word much more so than a set of activities or a role. Perhaps there are good reasons for people leaving the specifics left unsaid; some dominant people (poor examples, in my opinion) consider it inappropriate for a submissive partner to express desires of any sort, and perhaps it is to some extent a desire to play to that ethic that keeps people from saying anything beyond "I want a Daddy." Alternately, many people have little idea what they want in a partner, but just know that the idea of calling someone else Daddy in sexual sense and being called "Daddy's little girl" provides a sexual thrill. It might be suit me better if people were more verboise and explicit in what they were seeking, but that isn't really going to happen.
If someone were to ask me, I'd say this: let's give up on labels beyond their use as a self-identifier "hotbutton" like "little girl" or "Daddy". Let's not spend quite so much time trying to hash a differentiation (which was no purpose spare discrimination) out of such a wide-flung set of opinions.
As to the subject matter of the board as a way to keep out the AB male rabble that everyone else seems to worry about (and the femme-seeking-Mommy set, the trolls (i.e. fakes and pedofiles like wepee3) and the pro-dommes that bug me more), I think it might be best to restrict things only to the broadest of categories: people who identify as Daddies (regardless of gender or age) and people who identify as Little Girls (regardless of gender, exact age/role, or behaviors). By making it broad, it keeps filtering very simple: if you're a self-id'd Daddy or little girl, you're in; if you're anything else, don't post here unless you have an interest in discussing Daddy/Little Girl relationships.
Forgive me if that's a bit acrid and if there's a mistake or two, but I'm the sort who composes at the keyboard and doesn't care to type things up in an external word processer.
regards,