Posted by dad2u on August 24, 2009 at 12:39 [75.38.66.119]
In Reply to: Can I be happy again? posted by anon on August 18, 2009 at 19:00
to "anon" (or whoever replied to my earlier post) I'll post here what I explained in the email.
First, no one but YOU is responsible for your Happiness in life. As adults, if we don't like something about ourselves, we can change that. Nobody should have to "mold" themselves to fit someone else's expectations. (any True Daddy would know that and help you to become the person YOU want to be- not who they see you as. ) This holds true for anyone- not just AB Girls. I suspect from what you posted that you probably had to "compete" for attention in the larger family instead of being recognized on your own merit. Often when your interaction with others is like this growing up, as adults, you are still willing to change who you are in hopes of getting recognition and gaining acceptance. It was sad to hear you say that you didn't understand what went wrong with things 'cuz you were petite, pretty and popular ! Sweetie, I'm from Cali and we have LOTS of pretty, popular women who are just as lost in life. ( sorry Lindsay, Paris, and Britney ! ) If anything, the beauty just adds to the problem because people see that before the get to know the REAL you...
The problems you have are NOT insurmountable. You need to learn how to express YOUR needs.... (not expect a person to automatically know what you want) your past "daddies" had lots of requests for you... Where were YOUR demands?? If you don't know who you are, most people will make you someone they want you to be. That's human nature. If you see yourself as a "door Mat" they will be more then willing to walk all over you. So, learn that you TOO have a right to be heard, and Speak Up for yourself.
I also expect your self esteem isn't what it should be. (it's hard to feel good about ourselves when we don't like the person we've become. Get some help there 'Cuz I can't say this enough- If you like yourself and are confident in your abilities- then that's how others will start to see you.
I wish you All the Best. Maybe you can still hold on to your "lil" side , Just learn how to balance it with a Healthy, Happy, Adult side. The right Daddy would do that for you.
HUGS
Email: todavem@yahoo.com